THE TEN WORST SONGS OF ALL TIME (Plus Three)
Contained within is a list of the most awful, atrocious misdeeds against music I could come up with. Be forewarned, however: Every single one of these fucking songs will get stuck in your head. And you'll wish you'd never been born. You'll wish no one had ever been born. If you're clever, you won't click play on any of these; you've been warned. Here is the list of the Ten (plus three) Worst Songs Of All Time:
(Dis)Honorable Mention: Neil Diamond "Sweet Caroline"
Go into any karaoke bar and tell me this song is awesome. You're wrong.
Another (Dis)Honorable Mention: "You're The One That I Want" from Grease
FUCK. MUSICALS. But especially Grease.
10. Meat Loaf "Paradise By The Dashboard Light"
See the karaoke example above, but factor in a) The fact that it's EIGHT plus minutes long, b) it's a duet, so two people that can't sing are failing their way through it, and c) Classic Rock Radio won't let it die.
9. Madonna "American Life"
Clear line of demarcation when Madonna stopped being cool. Rapping.
8. 50 Cent "Just A Lil Bit"
The Most Cliché rap song of all time. Seriously, the lyrics are so unhip, they sound like they were ghost written by Carl Rove or some shit.
7. Hinder "Lips Of An Angel"
How in the fuck does a band with this voice out front get to be popular?
6. Unk "Walk It Out"
I Walk It Out / I Walk It Out / I Walk It Out. THAT IS HALF OF THE LYRICS. Andre 3000 is on this garbage, and even he made that the last four bars of his verse. The bottom of the lowest barrel on the most sunken barge in hip hop history: 2006.
5. Aqua "Barbie Girl"
Need I say more?
4. Katy Perry "Waking Up In Vegas"
Some of the worst lyrics I've ever heard. (And her voice annoys the crap out of me to begin with, so...goodie!)
3. Fergie "Fergalicious"
Holy SHIT this shit is toxic.
2. "Weird Al" Yankovic "Pretty Fly (For A Rabbi)"
Maybe the most annoying song of all time.
1. Styx "High Crimes & Misdemeanors (Hip-Hop-Cracy)"
THE most transparent attempt to be relevant ever set to record.
I'm sure there are some I've forgotten. Please tell me what they are in the comments!
(Dis)Honorable Mention: Neil Diamond "Sweet Caroline"
Go into any karaoke bar and tell me this song is awesome. You're wrong.
Another (Dis)Honorable Mention: "You're The One That I Want" from Grease
FUCK. MUSICALS. But especially Grease.
10. Meat Loaf "Paradise By The Dashboard Light"
See the karaoke example above, but factor in a) The fact that it's EIGHT plus minutes long, b) it's a duet, so two people that can't sing are failing their way through it, and c) Classic Rock Radio won't let it die.
9. Madonna "American Life"
Clear line of demarcation when Madonna stopped being cool. Rapping.
8. 50 Cent "Just A Lil Bit"
The Most Cliché rap song of all time. Seriously, the lyrics are so unhip, they sound like they were ghost written by Carl Rove or some shit.
7. Hinder "Lips Of An Angel"
How in the fuck does a band with this voice out front get to be popular?
6. Unk "Walk It Out"
I Walk It Out / I Walk It Out / I Walk It Out. THAT IS HALF OF THE LYRICS. Andre 3000 is on this garbage, and even he made that the last four bars of his verse. The bottom of the lowest barrel on the most sunken barge in hip hop history: 2006.
5. Aqua "Barbie Girl"
Need I say more?
4. Katy Perry "Waking Up In Vegas"
Some of the worst lyrics I've ever heard. (And her voice annoys the crap out of me to begin with, so...goodie!)
3. Fergie "Fergalicious"
Holy SHIT this shit is toxic.
2. "Weird Al" Yankovic "Pretty Fly (For A Rabbi)"
Maybe the most annoying song of all time.
1. Styx "High Crimes & Misdemeanors (Hip-Hop-Cracy)"
THE most transparent attempt to be relevant ever set to record.
I'm sure there are some I've forgotten. Please tell me what they are in the comments!
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