Skip to main content


The Demon (aka Dale Torborg) VS The Ultimate Warrior

A battle of facepaint for the ages!  The winner is that who breathes the air that SMELLS of combat!  WARIAAAAAGGGH!!!!!

Jimmy Jacobs VS Bobby Duncam Jr.

When I made these brackets this might've been a tossup, but since Jacob's match with ROH Champion Adam Cole, I have to give this one to the Vampire Princess.  He really showed his mettle.

Sin Cara VS Kamala The Ugandan Giant

Doesn't matter who's under the hood, Sin Cara's gettin' cannibalized.

Yoshihiro Tajiri VS Chris Youngblood

The Japanese Buzzsaw would cut this would-be totem poll to shreds, homie.

Masato Tanaka VS Lou Thez

It would be an interesting matchup, no doubt.  Masato Tanaka was tough as nails; he could take a Mike Awesome powerbomb from the ring through a table on the floor and still kick out at two.  Lou Thez was NWA Champion for a total time longer than anyone in history however (in fact, has the longest continuous reign as champion), and invented the powerbomb, as well as the STF, the belly-to-back suplex (Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit thank you handily, good sir) and of course the Thez Press (aka the Dick-To-Mouth; look the thing up on YouTube, you'll see what I mean).  Oh, and by the way, he just happens to have been trained by Ed "The Strangler" Lewis and Ray Steele.  And happens to be the youngest World Champion in any federation's history (in fact he won it twice before the NWA was invented.)  Thez is just too much for the ex-ECW champion to handle.  But holy shit would it be a fun one to watch to see these two go at it.

Scott Hall VS Santino Marella

I think the Bad Guy has every answer in the world for The Cobra.  There'll be comedy and possibly a dueling-abdominal stretches spot, but Hall's got this one in the bag.

"Maniac" Mike Davis VS Billy Jack Haynes

"I'ma shoot me some Indians.  They say I'm crazy, but then they gave me a gun." -Mike Davis, cutting a promo on The Youngbloods while holding a Super Soaker, GWF, 1992.  Who the hell can stop that?  Certainly not "I was 10 times better than Hulk Hogan!  I should be the biggest name in wrestling history" sour-grape ass muthatfucka Billy Jack Haynes.  Davis takes it.

Sheamus VS Bruiser Brody

This is one the more intriguing matchups in the tournament.  Bruiser Brody was 6'8" 240lbs and helped innovate the unruly, brawling style a lot of wrestlers use today.  Sheamus is a legit 6'6", 240 also, and uses a hard-nosed style with foundations in what Brody started.  I think Sheamus has Brody in the strength department, but not by much.  Brody was also trained by The Sheik (Sabu's uncle, not The Iron Shiek), so you know he straight up just doesn't give a fuck.  There's one time in a cage match with Lex Luger where he just...stopped selling.  Luger was leaving the territory and wouldn't "do the favor" on the way out by putting someone over, so Brody just ruined the match by no-selling everything, forcing Bill Alfonso to concoct a reason to DQ Luger on the fly (in a frickin' cage match, mind you) just to get the hell outta there.

All that aside, I think it would be an absolute dream match, but Sheamus would edge Brody due to his ability to throw a little science in there.  Controversial yes, but this my tournament.  Don't like it?  Tell me why I'm wrong in the comments, and I'll be happy to discuss it.


The Ultimate Warrior defeats The Demon
Jimmy Jacobs defeats Bobby Duncam Jr.
Kamala defeats Sin Cara
Tajiri defeats Chris Youngblood
Lou Thez defeats Masato Tanaka
Scott Hall defeats Santino Marella
Mike Davis defeats Billy Jack Haynes
Sheamus defeats Bruiser Brody

Come on back for Bracket XXXI!


Popular posts from this blog


This has certainly been a heck of a thing.

Writing this started out as a labor of love to a subgenre of rock and roll that came along at the perfect time for me (both when I was entering middle school in the bottom 5 of the popularity pecking order and when I started buying albums at the impressionable age of 11).  It obviously took a long time to put together: August 29th, 2016 is when I began planning, May 24th is when I wrote the last entry, the wee hours of August 1st, 2017 is when I finished proofreading and uploading the entries to the blog with video links, and here I am typing these words on August 15th.

The elephant in the room is this genre seems to be built on death.  Three of the four frontmen of these bands are dead, one of which occurred during the run of this series.  (Shouts to Alice In Chains bassist Mike Starr as well.  R.I.P.)  On top of that, Pearl Jam only exists because the lead singer of Mother Love Bone died, causing that band to break up.  If you go down the nex…

WHAT THE HELL IS A BLOG? - iTunes Music Reviews, April 2018

Being that it's been more than a year since I've attempted one of these and iTunes is gonna stop selling mp3's next year, this is probably my next to last chance to do this sort of thing.  I started doing hot take reviews of albums based off nothing but 30 second iTunes previews in 2007, and if I'd been smart, I'd've transitioned to YouTube with them in about 2009.  I didn't, so here we are.  If reading a slightly older gentleman trying to temper his apathy and vexation at modern pop music and give it a fair shake (or trying to be funny when shitting on things that he can't resist shitting on) is your jam, step up to the dance floor!

Scoring system goes from 0 stars (sometimes negative if it goes the extra mile of horrible) to five stars (which has happened three times in 11 years of doing this, and I'd take every one of them back because that's the thing with hot takes).  Here we go!

Cardi B "Invasion Of Privacy" ❂ & 1/2
(or ❂❂, dep…

MUSIC REVIEWS: Sophie, Hannah Diamond, The Brash Menagerie, Beach House & MC Lars

Hey, y'all.  Managed to cobble together some more opinions on the musics and such.  Let's see what listening to albums has done to my brain-to-word connectivity this week!

Ratings are like this:
0 Stars: Utter Shit
* Star: Had at least one redeeming thing about it, but definitely not my thing
** Stars: Meh.  Maybe a thing or two I liked, but definitely coulda been worse.
***: A Good Album.
****: A Great Album.
*****: Absolutely fucking incredible.  (Almost impossible to achieve.)

Sophie "Oil Of Every Pear's Un-Insides" *** and 1/4

Starts with a relaxing, reassuring song "It's Okay To Cry", which gets jarring out of nowhere at the end.  Which seemed needless, but then "Ponyboy" slams into the picture and I see what she was doing there: Dialating your sphincter for the unholy beating your asshole is about to endure.

This album is jagged; it's harsh; it's repellent; it's brutal; but most importantly: it's interesting.  It's…